Third Culture Kid and Proud

It’s been a while since my last entry and to be honest I think it’s because I don’t realize just how fast time flies by! I’ve had a lot of ideas to write about, but was having difficulty transcribing my thoughts into coherent words. Moreover, I was really looking for a topic that was close to heart, but something that all third culture kids could relate to. And then I received an email, a comment on my blog, and a subscription, all from the same person. That person happens to be one of my high school teachers, a good friend and a fellow TCK.  Then I learned that some teachers from my high school are using my blog in their advisories with their students.

Now, you could wonder why this would be of such importance or even worth writing about. Obviously there was the initial excitement at having my first subscriber and knowing that more people are following my blog. But more importantly, it was a source of great joy and pride to know that what I am writing can reach out to other TCKs, especially those in an environment that is so important to me. My high school isn’t just my high school. I spent 3 years there as a student, then I returned to work there for a year following my bachelor’s degree, and again after my master’s degree. It is probably the place where I feel the most in my element and the most at home. Strange, isn’t it, to say that about a building essentially, rather than a city or country? In truth it’s not about the building though, it’s about the people; they’re the ones that make a place what it is. There’s a comfort in being surrounded by people like you, people who understand your life. Going back to work in the library there or as a substitute teacher was perhaps the most personally and professionally fulfilling thing I’ve ever done. Knowing the students all had similar stories to mine, being able to connect with them, both as an alum from the school and as a TCK was a much more intense experience than I had expected.

I’ve lived my whole life as a third culture kid, in all the roller-coaster emotions and events that it entails. As an adult today, I’m still a third culture kid. This will be the case for a lot of TCKs. It’s not just something you are or did at some point in your life, it’s something that played a role in defining you and will always be part of who you are. Sometimes it’ll feel like a great thing to be a TCK, and other times it won’t be so easy. Being a third culture kid comes with a lot of baggage. I believe most of it is fantastic, and I’ve loved having the opportunities that this life gave me, but sometimes you see that in hindsight. When you’re leaving your friends, leaving a home that you knew so well, knowing that you have to start from scratch somewhere new, it doesn’t always feel like it’s an enriching and exciting adventure that will leave you with an amazing openness and awareness about the world. It just feels awful, empty and hollow. Then you arrive at that new place, make new friends before you know it, and everything is back to how it should be.  Yes, that’s easier said than done, but then again, it’s actually not that hard, is it? We are resilient beings, us TCKs, never forget that. The things we learn and the way we adapt as third culture kids will forever come in handy, even if you are no longer in a TCK environment. The qualities and skills we pick up as third culture kids will only serve as assets later in life. Use them wisely and you’ll go far no matter what you do and where you are.

I love being a third culture kid, even if it’s not always easy (as a child, a teenager or an adult). I love to write, read and talk about being a third culture kid. I love belonging to such a global community. It may be a ‘hidden’ community to those who don’t know it’s there, but for those of us who are a part of it, we know it’s thriving and growing. It stretches from one end of the globe to the other, spanning great distances and yet all the while proving that it is indeed a small world after all. If you ever have those ‘negative’ TCK moments, where you curse the endless moves you did, all those friends you had to say goodbye to, or if you find yourself surrounded by non-TCKs and you feel lost or alone, remember that there’s a whole bunch of us out there, and we understand. We’re lucky to be part of such a global and encompassing community. And trust me, when you’re no longer in a TCK environment, you’ll miss it, and you’ll seek out the comfort of those who are like you. For all its ups and downs, its complexities and endless twists, I love my third culture kid life, and I would never trade it.

I am a third culture kid, in everything that it means to be one, now and always.

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4 thoughts on “Third Culture Kid and Proud

  1. Oh Dounia, what a beautiful post! I have the shivers reading it. It’s been a pretty emotional week with Sept 11th commemorations, and I think TCK-ism (if there is such a word) is SO the way to move away from suspicion and xenophobia. Humans are capable of such wonderful things!
    I’m also hugely proud at the special metion i get- merci, merci, merci!
    The 11th graders are about to finish their test so i have to stop writing- bises and a bientot, Anne

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    1. I’m so happy you enjoyed it so much! How could I not give you a special mention after all your kind words and encouragement! That was a wonderful motivator and it was great to see that my blog could reach people that are very important to me. Thanks for reading and commenting so quickly! I definitely agree with what you’re saying, and let’s hope this next decade is brighter than the last. Good luck grading the tests 😉 Looking forward to hearing more of your thoughts in the future! 🙂

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  2. Hear hear! I used to be quite a pessimist about the future, and felt that humans were the worst thing that had happened to the planet. But as I get older I like our species more and more, and think we can manage to do wonderful things. In the animal world it’s natural to fear what is unknown and different, but we humans can, with a little education, actually EMBRACE things that are unknown and different, thanks to our amazing forebrain that allows us to move away from fundamental animal instinct. How fabulous is that?! So lots to be hopeful and optimisitc about.

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    1. It is indeed fabulous, and that’s why we always have to stay hopeful! Sometimes it’s a slow process, but like you said, as long as we stay optimistic and learn to embrace things that are unknown and different, we can definitely move things forward in a positive way! As always, thanks so much for your fascinating, thought-provoking and positive comments – keep them coming! 🙂

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